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| Blogs > Candigurl2010 > A lady in waiting. |
Although it was rainy outside,,it was sunny inside.
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Although it was rainy outside,,it was sunny inside. I am beginning to feel a comforting peace in my heart that has been absent for many years,(since Amy had left full time).I day dream all the time,not being able to focus on work.I can hear their voices,,their touch and over all feeling that,, they are with me. Before meeting them for a date,,I can't sleep the night before,,can't sit still,,I am checking my hair,,checking my skirt/blouse,,check my stockings making sure there are no runs,,looking for lipstick on my teeth,,looking in the mirror,,countless times..I always stop at their mailbox to check myself once more..OMG,,is this dating ever hard,,but I love every second of it!!! An Ora is over or around them.As I walk up to them,,seeing their out-stretched arms and big welcoming smiles,,I can feel the hair on the back of my neck rising up,,my heart is pounding,,I can feel perspiration beginning to form,,I am un-steady on in heels,,my mouth is dry and words don't seem to form!!!What is wrong with me?am I having a stroke?,,no,,I think it my be falling in love................ With the hugs,, kisses,, from them,,her hair tickling my face,,the warmth and softness of her face on mine,,his broad strong shoulders.I feel a calming effect,, as if,,I am finally home!Walking into their home,,all holding hands,,I can't keep my eyes or hands off them..I can't even remember driving to their house!!!Did I turn the computer off,,did I feed the cats,,did I turn the lights off?..We always drive back later to check on things,,lol..I just fall apart around them!!!!!!!We all laugh and hug each other..They asked if I know how to keep this from happening,,I said no..They said it could all be solved if I moved in with them full time or even part time..I almost blurted out,,,HELL YES,,but I want these feelings to get stronger..I am already staying 2 nights a week now,,they said to bring more things over to keep with them..M and I went shopping,,,,2 hot girls on the town,,,lol,,,to get everything I need so I don't have to bring a bag. I used to look forward to Mondays,getting back to work and my work schedule for the week.Now it's looking forward to the weekends to be together once more.I find myself going to their house on Friday afternoons and staying till Sunday afternoon.Every time I mention about leaving,,they talk me into staying a little longer,,they never have to ask twice,,lol. We all made dinner together on Fri nites sit and talk about the weeks events,,making plans for the oncoming weekend.Saturday we went to an engine show/swap meet,,a flea market was there also.As walking down the aisles,,I spied a stack of civil war books..I went over to them and the tag said,,8 dollars each,,the woman behind the table said they are now 5 bucks..So,,always looking for a bargain,,started looking through them,,I picked out 2 arm fulls and went to pay,,she said the rest of the stack was 10 dollars,,so took them all.When we took them to M's home, we took them in to look through..In each was an inscription saying for instance;,,"Happy Fathers Day Dad,,,from Craig and Joice!..I found out later from K,,,that the flea market woman bought those from a widow of a WWII vet that had pasted away a year earlier and was finally getting rid of her husbands things,,the Joice was his !!!!..I was in tears immediately when K told me the story...Why,,Why,,How could they part with such sentimental objects? I am a pack rat!..Anything historical,,family history,,or sentimental objects stays with me!..They are very organized and labeled..I believe in ones history,,whether good or bad. Looking into M & K's home it is much the same way..Their house is warm and cozzie,,well kept and they have family and friends pictures everywhere.Surrounded with little possessions that their made for them over the years..Family heirlooms hangs on the walls..To know where you want to go in life,,you have to know where you came from! After the flea market we went to the Harley shop,,awww the smell of the new bikes as we walked into the door!.M and I went to the clothes section and was holding clothes up to each other..Feeling her fingers touching me as she held them on me,,smile on her face and twinkle in her eyes,,I could just melt,,she always hesitated longer than normal while holding them on me,,,to catch a feel I guess,,sweet girl!.We bought nothing,,just looking.Went over to the bikes,,but didn't see any Heritage Softails there.I always loved the look of those,,the leather bags and fringe.M insisted that I get the fringe for the floor boards and clutch/brake levers,,not to mention a leather jacket with fringe also,,,lol.So back to the clothes,,had to try them all on,,,lol.What a day!!!! Being with them,,I always feel like a woman,,treated as such and accepted..She makes me feel like a girly girl,,doing our hairs,,dressing,,clothing,,fashions and womanhood in general..I was finally nude in front of her this weekend for the first time,,it was like 2 girls hanging out trying on clothes,,,but I did catch her sneaking a peek,,,wink,,lol..K,,always a gentleman,,very attentive and always helpful..Every once in a while he has a way of bringing the guy out in me!..I don't mind it,,but our conversation would drift to guy things,,then un-aware what I am doing ,, my fem side slips a little and we are buddies..We both laugh,,hug each other and give kisses..He is a doll!!! It's funny how even the little meaningless tasks are so exciting when with someone who you are starting to have feelings toward..Grocery shopping,,making a meal,,washing the dishes,,cleaning the house,,all the while talking about our lives,,sharing ideas.When the topics get a little intense,,we sit down,,cry a little,,laugh a lot and hold one another often!.I know,,,I am sounding like a girl!,,lol. When we leave one another,,we all have tears and long hugs,,standing in the driveway till we freeze or are drowned. I love how both are so accepting and let things develop for themselves. I don't understand it,, I was so happy and up beat all weekend and within a half hour I am so depressed,,lonely and it is so quiet in the house,,I can still hear their words echoing in my mind,,feel the kisses of their lips! Don't worry,,,I always show them a copy of this before I post! This is beginning to be the best times of my life,,,and I had a lot of good times all ready!!!..Have to do laundry and get ready for the up coming week.....Hugs...Candi  |
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It is.I can only remember one other time I have felt that and I still do about her.Thanks for the warm regards,I really appreciate it...hugs...Candi
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3/29/2010 3:43 am |
Candi, M and K are both very lucky to have found YOU. I wish you all the happiness in the world and that it never ends.
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I am happy for you. You have found someone that accepts you for who you are, a beautiful young lady. They know that you are a very lovely caring person. Hope it continues. Hugs and Kisses 
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Candi, I am so happy and pleased you have found such an incredible feeling. It is such a wonderful feeling finding someone(s) that you can connect and just let you be you. Acceptance of who you really are is so important and can lead to so much pleasure; emotionally and physically When you feel that emotional connection, that is higher than any other feeling. I hope that all continues to work out and your happiness continues to grow to endless possibilities. Ron
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My dear....sweet Candigurl.....You are falling in love and what a wonderful sight that is. Breath it in, enjoy it, embrace it, let your self go to it, nuzzle and cuddle it. There is no richer feeling in the world. My heart rejoices for you. Love....Love....Love shine down on thee .....As always.....Jen
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Oh my,,Thanks to all of you sweet guys and girls!! I don't live in a fairy tale world,,I am a big girl.But once in a while a person needs to let go of their inhibitions and let things fall where they may.Even a turtle has to stick it's neck out to get across the road.I have no expectations with them,,I live day to day and relish what is given to me. I could not ask for anyone better in this couple.It does break my heart though as I have been making friends here in the mails and IMs.My feelings has been growing with them,,and I think theirs toward me.I know there are people who is just as good as the couple I see.I have plenty of room in my heart for a lot of friends,,,loving friends,,,but unfortunately,,,not the time.I hope they will continue to be my friends..I still want to talk,,to confer,,to lean on,,and them lean on me,,follow their everyday life and be a part of it. There are always downsides to every good event,,this is one of them.Who knows,,,this may not work out,,and will be at square 1 again.. Thanks to all whom has supported me,,,you are kind and good.,,,hugs...Candi
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thats amaizing unique feeling care about your m&k deeply all sort of common things so openly l bet they made same to you its like big enthuse betweeb you and them.allways like to hear your sincere feelings love to send you best wishes and warm hugs. btw recently l adore lady gaga's telephone what about you? kisssessss.
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Candi.....enjoy your moment in the sun sweet pea, your true friends will remain true friends.....especially through the passage of time. Your heart is HUGE!!!! and you give sooo much..... so fear not little one... for you have much joy ahead of you. Smile and sing as you do your laundry,,, reminisce about the weekend and look forward to the next. Love you more than you know.....Jen
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